Category: Animal Jokes

A mangy looking guy goes into a restaurant and orders a hamburger. The waiter shakes his head and says, “No way. I don’t think you can pay for it.”

DAY 752 – My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.

Stray cats will not be fed. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food.

When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

A man goes into a pet shop and tells the owner that he wants to buy a pet that can do everything.

Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat’s mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and […]

A forest ranger is making rounds in a remote part of the wooded reserve when he comes across an unkempt man, sitting at a makeshift campfire. To the ranger’s horror, the man is eating a fish and a bald eagle.

A woman wanted a pet to keep her company at home while her husband was off at work and the children were in school.