Looking for a Hitman

There was an opening with the CIA for an assassin. These highly classified positions are hard to fill, and there’s a lot of testing involved in filling the position.

After sending some applicants through the background checks, training and testing, they narrowed the possible choices down to two men and a woman, but only one position was available.

The day came for the final test to see which person would get the extremely secretive job. The CIA men administering the test took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances” they explained. “Inside this room, you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill her.”

The man got a shocked look on his face and said, “You can’t be serious! I could never shoot my own wife!”

“Well,” says the CIA man, “You’re definitely not the right man for this job then.”

They bring the second man to the same door and hand him a gun. “We must know that you will follow instructions no matter what the circumstances,” they explained to the second man. “Inside you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill her.”

The second man looked a bit shocked, but nevertheless took the gun and went in the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes, then the door opened and the man came out of the room with tears in his eyes. “I tried, but I just couldn’t pull the trigger. I guess I’m not the right man for the job.”

“No” the CIA man replied, “You don’t have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.”

Now only the woman is left to test.

They lead her to the same door to the same room and hand her the same gun. “We must be sure that you will follow instructions no matter what the circumstances, this is your final test. Inside you will find your husband sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill him.”

The woman takes the gun and enters the room, closing the door behind her. Almost immediately, gunshots can be heard – one shot after another after another. They then hear screaming, crashing and banging on the walls for several minutes and then silence.

The door opens slowly and there stands the woman. She wipes the sweat from her brow and says “You guys didn’t tell me the gun was loaded with blanks! I had to beat him to death with the chair!”

Thanks, Joanne Pepper.


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