The blonde wife came home from her first day commuting into the city. Her husband noticed she was looking a little pale and asked, "Honey, are you feeling all right?" "Not really," she replied. "To tell you the truth, I'm a little nauseous fro...
A blonde decided she needed something new and different for a winter hobby. She went to the bookstore and bought every book she could find on ice fishing. For weeks she read and studied, hoping to become an expert in the field. Finally she deci...
One night a blonde nun was praying in her room when God appeared before her. "My daughter, you have pleased me greatly. Your heart is full of love for your fellow creatures, and your actions and prayers are always for the benefit of others. I ha...
Back in the old west, there was a need to connect the east and the west with a telegraph line. The Manager of the project advertised for workers to complete the job. Three groups responded. A group of Chinese, a group of Italians, and a group of B...
A policeman was interrogating three blondes who were training to become detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows them a picture, then hides it. "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?" The first blond...
A blonde and a redhead met in a bar after work for a drink, and were watching the 6 O'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge. The blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump, and the redhead replied, "I'll ta...
A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and stops to entertain at a bar in a small town. He's going through his usual run of stupid blonde jokes, when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and says: "I've heard just about enough...
A blonde received a gift certificate for helicopter flying lessons for her birthday. One day she was bored and decided to take advantage of the opportunity. When she arrived at the place, the instructor said, "Well, there's only one helico...
Three blondes died and are at the Pearly Gates of Heaven. St. Peter tells them they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple little question. St. Peter asks the first blonde, "What is Easter?" The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy. It'...
The blonde reported for her university final examination, which consisted of "yes" or "no" questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes her purs...
An Irishman, a Mexican and a blond guy doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building, stopped to eat lunch. The Irishman said, "Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch I'm going...
Trying to escape a fire, Brunette, a Redhead, and a Blonde climb to the roof of a burning building. Meanwhile, firefighters gather on the street below, holding a blanket for the women to jump into. The firemen yell to the Brunette, "Jump! Jum...
"What's the date today?" asked the blonde riding on the subway. "I don't know," replied a fellow commuter. "You've got a newspaper in your hands ... why don't you look at the date on it?" "Why, that won't do any good," the blonde huffed. "It's y...
On a plane bound for New York the flight attendant approached a blonde sitting in the first class section and requested that she move to economy since she did not have a first class ticket. The blonde replied, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm g...
An airline captain was helping a new blonde flight attendant prepare for her first overnight trip. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight. The next m...
A blonde holding a baby walks into a drug store and asks the clerk if she can use the store's baby scale. "Sorry, ma'am," says the clerk. "Our baby scale is broken. But we can figure the baby's weight if we weigh mother and baby together on the adu...
Fifteen minutes into the flight from New York to Phoenix, the captain announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed. There is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have thr...
A blonde signs up for research project testing "smart" pills. Amazingly, the pills work and the blonde becomes smarter. So she dyes her hair and becomes a brunette. One day, she is out driving in the country and spots a farmer in his field with...
Bill bought his beautiful blonde wife, Sherry, a cell phone for their first wedding anniversary. Sherry loved the gift, and watched intently as Bill explained all the features on the phone. The next day, as Sherry is having her hair done, he...
A redhead, brunette and blonde were on their way to Heaven. God told them the stairway to Heaven was 1000 steps, and on every 5th step He'd tell them a joke. But, they must not laugh or else they couldn't enter heaven. The brunette went first and...
