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The Theory of Cat Behavior

LAW OF CAT INERTIA - A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force, such as the opening of cat food.  LAW OF CAT MOTION - A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change direction. FIRST LAW OF CAT ENERGY CONSERVATION - Cats know that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will, therefore, use as little energy as possible. LAW OF BAG/BOX OCCUPANCY - All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the earliest possible nanosecond. LAW OF FURNITURE REPLACEMENT - A cat\'s desire to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of the furniture. LAW OF CAT COMPOSITION - A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-matter + It Doesn\'t Matter. LAW OF CAT OBEDIENCE - As yet undiscovered.