Month: October 2008
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Henry Ford & God
Henry Ford dies and goes to Heaven. At the Gates, St. Peter greets Ford, and tells him, “Well, you’ve been such a good guy, and your invention… the assembly line for the automobile… has changed the world. As a reward, you can hang out with anyone in Heaven you want.”
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Daffynitions
Every year the Washington Post conducts a contest in which readers are asked to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter and supply a new definition. Here are some of this year’s winners:
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The Talking Dog
This guy sees a sign in front of a house “Talking Dog for Sale.” He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the back yard. The guy goes into the back yard and sees a mutt sitting there.
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Little Johnny Meets the Bishop
Little Johnny’s father was a rector in a small church. When the bishop came to visit, Little Johnny became very excited.
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Tell Me Your Problems
A wild-eyed man dressed in a Napoleonic costume and hiding his right hand inside his coat entered the psychiatrist’s office and nervously exclaimed, “Doctor, I need your help right away.”
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War in the Church
There was a church where the preacher and the song leader were not getting along. This began to spill over into the worship service.
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The Declaration of Independence
A Kentucky teacher was quizzing her students. “Johnny, who signed the Declaration of Independence?”
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NASA Interviews
NASA was interviewing professionals to be sent to Mars. Only one could go, and he couldn’t return to Earth.